Thankfully

There are many things to be grateful for in this beautiful world.

Apparently, I haven’t really realized how important being thankful is.

School, a jail for some and heaven for others. I honestly have never been fond of school itself. Sure, I love studying. Well at least reading and writing.
Like I have probably said in any of my other previous posts, I am was an introvert. I never wanted company, or even try playing tag with the others. My mother always talked about how I was a quiet kid and read 3-4 books each day. Ridiculous yet real.
Until now, I’m not even sure what I want to be in the future. My father knows how I love drawing and told me to apply for a design major in one of the top universities.
At first, I agreed. But then I found out how incredibly hard it is to be accepted in universities like that.
Even so, my father still never lost hope in me; as said the meaning of my name ‘Nadia’.
The only problem is that I’m losing hope in myself.

That’s part of what “I don’t thank myself for”. I was already accepted in the best junior high in my city, and now I’m in the best high school in my city, yet I’m still complaining about how I can’t reach for my dreams? Stupid.

My parents believe in me, they know that I have the guts to fight for that perfectly good school but I feel like I can’t pick up my weapon.
And I’m now trying my very best to win it.

So how should we be thankful of school?

1. Just do it.
This sounds boring as you see this tagline everywhere, but it’s true. Don’t dare complain about homework and tests. Just. Do. IT.

2. Friends? Bullshit.
I have gave trust to many people and I’m starting to lose it, so my advice here : trust no one besides family and God. And if the context is in school, then yes, trust your teacher.
They usually give you good advice you can’t deny.
Yeah, we have “best friends” at school. But you’ll never know when they’ll end up hanging with other people besides you. Then stab you from behind.

3. Scores (bad?/good?)
If you are a goody two-shoes and always get good scores, fine. You don’t really need to worry about what I’m going to say after this.
Nevermind, carry on.

I’m average, forced to fit in with the smarties. As silly as it seems, I was always in the top classes but I always got bad ranks (around 12~14) because EVERY. SINGLE. STUDENT. in my class is super smart. Geniuses.
I did graduate with a high score though, surprisingly. A score where my parents started questioning me.

My father also laughed when my teacher said I got the 7th rank in class, and that I should stay in the Science class. He said that I wanted to move to the Social studies class – which is absolutely bullshit, because I don’t fancy anything long and boring like History and Sociology. Don’t get me started on Economy.

Anyway, from what I’ve learned, you should be happy with whatever your results are. Don’t compare scores with friends, don’t judge friends just because they passed/failed an exam. That very exam might just be their weakness, and they can win at you in other subjects. Ones that you don’t expect them to exceed at.

Once, my wise friend said: “If you hate a certain subject, then why complain when you have to do the remedial? You’d only want to answer the same, annoying questions if you actually like the subject, thus explaining why you’d want a score that small. Then, if you really hate that said subject, you’d try your best to get a high score then resulting to never having to answer those again.”
Yes, that is one long line. It’s all true though.

So, tip 1 for those who get bad scores:
Don’t feel down.
Tip 2, be thankful! Like my mother said, by doing the remedial, you actually have to learn for it again which means that you are repeating and learning again, more than the ones who have passed. You’ll ace it better than them!
Tip 3, bad scores aren’t the end of the world. You will graduate, and I guarantee that you will have good scores! Just be positive and fight on!

And for people who get good scores,
1. Never feel pleased with yourself. Even by getting a perfect 100, you still need to study again and again. Allah hates people who feel too proud of themselves and boast around. Even if you don’t show it to people, your little heart says how you feel great and probably won’t want to study that again.
For those who haven’t got 100 yet, study again so you’d get it!

Then, for everyone:

1. NEVER CHEAT
2. Never have a target score of the standard score. Example, the minimum score is 75, aim for 90. Don’t stay safe and study to only get a 75 or anywhere near 75.
3. Enjoy school!

That’s the end of this somewhat motivational post that I just happened to write (even thought I’m REALLY hungry now)

I’m just saying that I don’t go to school for ranks and scores.
I don’t go to make “best friends” and hang out.
I definitely don’t want to love, date or make any commitment with anyone.
I’m not interested in cheating, skipping class, or anything dumb like that.

I go to school to study and have fun. I accept what scores I get. I talk to my good friends.
I’m thankful that I can go to school, and I’m sorry that I can’t get the best scores and I’m wasting my opportunity to learn since many people out there also want to go to school yet can’t.

But, at least I’m thankful for being alive to this very moment.

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