(the longest title of any of my posts lol)
i’ve always felt like i don’t fit in society. at times, i had best friends but even my best friends had their own best friends.
i only felt like my true self now, in high school. with friends that i honestly think look plain average (just like me) but have big dreams to change indonesia.
i have hobbies; drawing, singing, editing, writing, watching. i only think that i’m an average at all, considering the fact that they’re just a hobby and i don’t have a lot of free time on my hands to explore my talents. there are so many people with better art, a better voice, better editing skills, better stories, than me. sure, i can’t let that break me down, but what happens if i actually did?
i never knew what i liked and what i’m good at. besides helping classmates with my notes, and lending pens, etc. i try my best to be helpful – and i know that’s the only thing that i’m capable of.
i’m no superhero. i’m not that cheerleader that boys fall for, nor that vocalist with a voice that never fails to melt our hearts. i could never paint a masterpiece that qualifies to be in any art museum. i could publish a novel – but i know no one would be interested with my lame choice of vocabulary and plot ideas.
i am me. nadia.
i know there are tons of people better than me, in the things that i love doing. and i know i can never be them. i know i’m envious of them but i can’t force myself to be like them.
winning competitions, getting fame, making everyone proud.
yes, i want that. i want to be acknowledged by everyone. i want to make my family proud. i want my crush to notice me. i want everyone to be me.
but i’m only capable of doing what i can, little by little.
i don’t like cheating in tests, but i help friends by lending notes and teaching them before the test.
i hate it when people litter because even though rubbish is small, it is a huge deal.
even though i can only care for my friends and try my best to take care of the environment, that’s the least that i can do.
i know every little thing that i do will have an impact for the future, and so do you.
not all of us are born perfect. we have different paths to walk past.
now you’ll see many of my friends already succeeding and i’m just here doing nothing (at least that’s what you see) but i’m capable of changing the world.
just wait and see.